Well, it is Thursday evening and still no new court date. And so I wait. This means that it is not happening tomorrow. I am hoping the lawyer can schedule for Monday or sometime next week...if not, I am praying what to do next. With Ryan in seminary, working, and taking care of three little ones...I am not sure how long I can be gone. And so I wait.
Today, the waiting was made easier by an unexpected surprise. My new friend, Michelle, was hosting a team from New York with the Ugandan Water Project. They led the little ones at the baby cottage in worship...and it was a precious sight! Just seeing them clapping and dancing...adorable! And holding Judah while he sang praises was memorable. After the little ones went to lunch and nap, the team headed to CRO, to minister to the street kids of Jinga. Once again, I was touched just by seeing a hundred kids just glowing to sing praises to Jesus. And these were street kids...tattered clothes...no shoes...yet they had hope and smiles as they clapped and sang along. I am trying to tell myself that the waiting is not hard...compared to what these street kids walk through on a daily basis. I am trying to tell myself that the waiting is not hard...compared to the little one that has serious special needs and runs around the orphanage yelling. I am trying to tell myself that the waiting, the being alone, the missing my family it is all worth it. When I look into Judah's eyes or I hold him close....I KNOW that it is worth it. Judah is worth it. And this is what the Lord has asked of me, so it is worth it. And again, the whisper....He died for me...because I was worth it to Him.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
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Lindsey, your attitude and heart truly come through in this post. It has blessed my heart and my day immensely. I know that this is a hard time for you and your family. I, too, believe that it is all worth it. I am thankful to still have a familiar face for my girl to see on a daily basis. I know that probably makes being away easier. It certainly makes it easier for this momma's heart. Thank you for your vulnerability and know that you are all in our prayers. Love you!
ReplyDeleteOh, Lindsey! Every word you typed is true. Believe them. It is SOOOOOOOO worth it! I am praying that the Holy Spirit would breathe on you and revive your fainting heart. I know you are physically and emotionally drained. Don't give up!! Allow yourself to rest in God's compassionate arms. He has planned this waiting period from the beginning of time. It doesn't make sense, but He sees the grand picture and how beautiful everything will turn out.
ReplyDeleteMay you have wisdom beyond measure to know how to make the best decisions for your family. I am lifting you up even now. It's 11 p.m. your time. I pray you are sleeping well and that you awaken feeling restored and refreshed and rejuvenated!
After I finished typing the last comment, i was reading Crazy Love and wanted to share what Chan said.
ReplyDelete"If we truly desire to please God, we cannot [play it safe]. We have to do things that cost us during our life on earth but will be more than worth it in eternity."
Lindsey, be encouraged that you are sacrificing your life here on earth (personal comfort, being in a strange land without luxuries, being away from family, etc.). You are doing so out of a desire to love the Lord more than anything in this world. It is a beautiful thing, and eternal rewards await you! I believe you are experiencing a small taste of heaven even now, and I envy you! Drink it in- there is so much more to come!